Friday, June 18, 2010

Hospital window.

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room’s only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation. Every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window. The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside. The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance. As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene. One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by. Although the other man couldn’t hear the band – he could see it. In his mind’s eye as the gentleman by th! e window portrayed it with descriptive words. Days and weeks passed. One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.
As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone. Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed. It faced a blank wall. The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall. She said, “Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you.”

The important things in life.

The important things in life.
A philosophy professor stood before his class with some items on the table in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks, about 2 inches in diameter. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was. The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous “Yes.” “Now,” said the professor, “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The rocks are the important things – your family, your partner, your health, your children – things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter – like your job, your house, your car. The sand is everything else. The small stuff.” “If you put the sand into the jar first,” he continued “there is no room for the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take your partner out dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal. Take care of the rocks first – the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.”

God's cake...

God's cake...
This is one of the best I’ve ever read as an explanation.

Sometimes we wonder, 'What did I do to deserve this?' or 'Why did God have to do this to me?' Here is a wonderful explanation! A daughter is telling her Mother how everything is going wrong, she's failing algebra, her boyfriend broke up with her and her best friend is moving away. Meanwhile, her Mother is baking a cake and asks her daughter if she would like a snack, and the daughter says, 'Absolutely Mom, I love your cake.' 'Here, have some cooking oil,' her Mother offers. 'Yuck' says her daughter. 'How about a couple raw eggs?' 'Gross, Mom!' 'Would you like some flour then? Or maybe baking soda?' 'Mom, those are all yucky!' To which the mother replies: ‘Yes, all those things seem bad all by themselves. But when they are put together in the right way, they make a wonderfully delicious cake! ' God works the same way. Many times we wonder why He would let us go through such bad and difficult times. But God knows that when He puts these things all in His order, they always work for good! We just have to trust Him and, eventually, they will all make something wonderful! God is crazy about you. He sends you flowers every spring and a sunrise every morning. Whenever you want to talk, He'll listen. He can live anywhere in the universe, and He chose your heart.

Monkey!!!

Once in Brazil a plane crashed, only a monkey who was traveling in the plane was left alive. Fortunately the monkey was intelligent enough to understand our language and reply in actions.

The officials went to see the monkey in the hospital and had a talk with the monkey.

Officer: "When the plane took off what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "Tying their belts"
Officer: "What were the air hostesses doing?"
Monkey: "Saying Hello! Good morning!"
Officer: "What were the pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Checking the system"
Officer: "What were you doing?"
Monkey: "Looking for my people"

Officer: "After 10' minutes what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "Having beverages and snacks"
Officer: "What were the air hostesses doing?"
Monkey: "Serving the travelers"
Officer: "What were the Pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Handling the steering"
Officer: "What were you doing?"
Monkey: "Eating & throwing"

Officer: "After 30 minutes what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "Some were sleeping and some were reading"
Officer: "What were the air hostesses doing?"
Monkey: "Make up"
Officer: "What were the pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Handling the steering"
Officer: "What were you doing?"
Monkey: "Nothing"

Officer: "Just before plane crash what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "All were sleeping"
Officer: "What were the pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Handling the air hostess"
Officer: What were you doing?
Monkey: Handling the steering!!!!

An absolutely Brilliant Joke, ENJOY!!!

A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods.

She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap.

The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes."

The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes.

Whatever you wish for, your husband will get ten times of it!" The woman said, "That's okay."

For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world.

The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will floc to".

The woman replied, "That's okay, because I will be the most beautiful woman and he will have eyes only for me."

So, KAZAM-

she's the most beautiful Woman in the world!

For her second wish, she

wanted to be the richest woman in the world.

The frog said, "That will make

your husband the richest man in the world. And he will be ten times richer than you. "

The woman said, "That's okay, because what's mine is his and what's his is mine."

So, KAZAM- she's the richest woman in the world!

The

frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, "I'd like to have a mild heart attack."

Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them.

Attention

female readers:

This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good

Male

readers: Please scroll down.

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The man had a heart attack ten times

"milder" than his wife!!!

Moral of the story : Women are really dumb but think they're really smart .

Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show

PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen!!!

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Horoscope test

Horoscope Test...
If you are honest this tells the truth - it's pretty good
Write your answers on a piece of paper. No cheating !!
The answers are at the bottom of this page.
1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.
2. Which is your favourite colour out of red, black, blue, green, yellow?
3. Your first initial?
4. Your month of birth?
5. Which colour do you like more, black or white?
6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.
7. Your favourite number?
8. Do you like Sydney or Brisbane more?
9. Do you like a lake or the ocean more?
10. Write down a wish (a realistic one).
When you're done, scroll down. (Don't cheat)
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Answers
1. You are completely in love with this person.
2. If you choose:
Red - You are alert and your life is full of love. Black - you are conservative and aggressive. Green - your soul is relaxed and you are laid back Blue - you are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you love. Yellow- you are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down.
3. If your initial is:
A-K You have a lot of love to give in friendships in your life.
L-R You try to enjoy your life to the maximum and your love life is soon to blossom.
S-Z You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.
4. If you were born in: Jan-Mar: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected.
April-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will last long and the memories will last forever.
July-Sep: You will have a great year and will experience a major life-changing experience for the good.
Oct-Dec: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soul mate.
5. If you chose..... Black: Your life will take on a different direction, it will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.
White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do anything for you, but you may not realize it.
6. This person is your best friend.
7. This is how many close friends you have in your lifetime.
8. If you chose: Sydney : You like adventure. Brisbane : You are a laid back person.
9. If you chose:
Lake : You are loyal to your friends and your lover and are very reserved.
Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.